Jeremy Piven Recovers from Illness With Help From The Ladies

“Entourage” actor, Jeremy Piven appears to have recovered from his “bout” of mercury poisoning with the aid of a new lady friend.

Jeremy met the woman of his dreams at Britney Spears’ 27th birthday bash last December to which all the finest grade ladies in Hollywood attended. Ashley Chontos, a 23 year old ex-model and waitress or at least that’s what her business card says, is the new hottie in Piven’s life for the next five minutes.

Although Piven was actually gunning for another girl he met at the party, his relentless pursuit scared the girl shitless and she bailed leaving dejected Jeremy with no other choice than to follow up with sloppy seconds in the form of Ashley and is now so crazy in love that he has decided to invite Ashley to the Golden Globes this year instead of his mum as he has for the past four years, so he doesn’t come over all gay mummy’s boy yet again.

Piven is certain that Ashley is the one, although before leaving Britney’s party, he had also sent a text shout out to all the women he had met that night, inviting them to a free for all first dibs sexy time session with him back at his hotel room. His text read "Come to my room - whoever responds first gets me for the night."

Wow, that’s one tempting invite; unfortunately nobody came forward, so Piven followed up on the Chontos lead.

Piven is now currently in Bangkok allegedly undergoing treatment for his mercury poisoning or so rumour has it whilst the love of his life stayed in Miami prepping for her upcoming appearance at the Globes and her one chance to make it big as a Hollywood star. They are keeping their love alive via tender text messages.

Hopefully they will find a cure for Jeremy so he can return to his beautiful lady and continue his sushi worship.